Divorce is complicated. Some people could even confirm that no one wins in a divorce. There are bad things that come forward such as cheating on someone, lying and various types of abuses that happen in a marriage that can ultimately lead to divorces. The goal of this article is not to provide advice to someone going through a typical divorce, but to offer tips to a person going through an unnatural divorce.
1. Get Your Team in Order
No case is won with an inferior team. While you do not need an expensive A-Team, you do need a competent attorney that is experienced. There are many things that can come out in a divorce, and it helps significantly to be prepared for any potential situation. A family law lawyer, or team of them, is qualified to represent you in your case. You have to have full confidence in your legal representation, or you will have to find another expert.
Because finances are part of every legal end of a marriage, it can help to include a Divorce Financial Planner. It is these professionals that work to minimize any financial setbacks that might occur when a proposal is received from a third party.
Finally, it can be helpful to seek out a therapist that can provide support to you or your minor children. There are many emotional and psychological factors that exist in every divorce. Making sure that your emotions are in check due to guidance from an expert can help you to become a stronger human being during the legal separation from your partner.
2. Do Not Move Out
Some men and women make a mistake when a divorce case is filed: they leave home. Do not move out whether you are by yourself or if you have children. You do not want a court to rule in favor of your spouse which is called “de facto possession.” Due to the range of emotional issues that are encountered, keeping access to your current home is a smart decision. You have a right to live where you are right now regardless if you or your spouse has already filed divorce paperwork.
3. Keep Your Assets Safe
Some say that divorce is like a war. People tend to do things they would not usually do. People can hide money, spend too much money or sell off personal assets without telling a spouse. Keeping good records can help you before and during the divorce process. You can make a list of what you currently own, get copies of tax records, current loan statements, credit card bills and other financial data. It is best to obtain data going back two years or more of each record type.
Having this range of documents can help you to be prepared during the pre-divorce stage.
4. Expect the Unexpected
While in court, anything can be brought up by your spouse. If you’ve ever had any type of verbal or physical altercation, this event can and usually will be brought forth. Things such as a retaliatory post on Facebook, argumentative texts, confrontational emails or any other thing may be perceived as being negative. It is also a good idea to never speak in a negative way about your imminent ex while in the presence of your children. If you do not want a judge to read or hear what you’ve written or said, be calm and quiet as possible until your court date.
An excellent divorce lawyer will already know what might be brought forward in court. By being honest with your legal team, and keeping a cool head, you put yourself in a better position to reach a positive outcome.
5. Brain Power Versus Your Heart
There are many people that end up relying on their heart in a divorce case settlement. No one said that divorce is easy to go through. With that being said, you have to take away the emotional attachment that you have to your spouse. By thinking with your brain, you will be able to prepare easier and act in a more professional manner. Your emotions will be disconnected, and this could help you greatly in your settlement. If you make a poor decision based on your emotions, that decision can haunt the outcome of your divorce. Your legal team and therapist can coach you through what will likely be the hardest time of your life.
The financial and real estate settlements that are part of a divorce will require your full attention, and the ability to think without emotional baggage might improve your overall success rate.
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